Bernhard

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December, 2000 - Vol. XXIX No. 3
All About Confirmation

"Is There Life after Confirmation?"
by The Rev. Deacon Margaret Bernhard

The punch bowl is empty, the cookies have all been eaten. The newly confirmed have had their pictures taken with the Bishop and everyone is now going off for family dinners. The Priest sighs and thinks, "Well, I’ll see them again when they are married, then when the baby is baptized and then hopefully when their children are school-age, they’ll be regulars again." That was frequently the way it was and sadly still is at times today.

Even with the renewed understanding of Confirmation as an adult realization of one’s Baptismal vows, there is still a feeling that young people need to be "done" and then everyone can relax until the wedding.

However, we are challenged to help the young people who have chosen to make a public commitment to Christ and the Church to help them activate that commitment. They have now pronounced themselves willing to take on adult responsibilities as baptized Christians. What are those responsibilities and how do we help them find themselves in their new role?

One of the best ways is to understand our own roles as adults. If we ask ourselves about what we need to understand our ministries and gifts, we will undoubtedly discover what young people need as well. We are a people blessed with diverse gifts and talents and as adults we are encouraged to explore those gifts and discern how they may be used to share the Gospel of Christ. Young people, as well, need guidance and help to realize what their gifts are and how to use them. A person who is uncomfortable with children should not be teaching Sunday School, likewise a person who glories in numbers and account-keeping should probably be directed to the nearest Church treasurer. Young people are the same way: some enjoy younger children, some do not. Some like to wash cars, some do not; some want to have an active role in the worship of the congregation, some do not. We have a responsibility to help them discover their gifts, so that they can be the people God intended.

After discovering gifts, then we need to help identify appropriate ministry areas. This can be a problem where young people are seen as perpetual clean-up crews, car washers, and leaf rakers. Like adults, not all young people are gifted in those areas and are turned off by the assumption that the Youth Group are the perpetual dish washers and people to put away the tables. Not all adults want to do those jobs and we compound the problem by assuming work will be done and not asking if young people would like to do certain chores.

So what ministries are available to young people? Where can their gifts be used? With guidance, there are few limits. They can serve as acolytes, choir members, lectors, and as Lay Eucharistic Ministers (see General Convention’s change in the Canon removing "adult" as being a requirement for being licensed). They can serve in the Sunday School as teachers, aides, and nursery workers. They can go with others to visit the shut-in; they can serve meals to the hungry. They can rake leaves for the elderly, march for Civil Rights, protest the closing of day care centers, etc. If you have the sense that the list is endless, you are correct.

However, and it is a big however, the young people need to be invited, included and welcomed to share their gifts. They need to know that what they say and do matters. There is no room for condescension and tolerance. Young people know when they are figuratively being patted on the head. They have energy and enthusiasm to offer. Yes, they need guidance, but they deserve the opportunity to become part of the adult structure of the congregation.

The opportunity may be there for youth to accept adult responsibilities, but they will not do it if they see adults around them refusing to accept their own responsibilities: adults who do not attend worship regularly because they have a "better offer" that Sunday; adults who grouse about their pledges and do not take the time to understand the financial needs of the parish or the Diocese; adults who find complaining about the church and the world easier than working to share the Gospel with all with whom they come in contact. We, as adults, have to live out our baptismal covenants, not only for ourselves, but also for those who see us as role models. That is also as part of our baptismal agreement as we promise to support those who have made their vows in their life in Christ. Recognition of gifts, opportunities for ministry, guidance, and role modeling can all help the young confirmand assume the mantle of adulthood. The church will benefit, the individual will grow and in both will God’s word be proclaimed.

Margaret ("Peg") is deacon of the parish at Good Samaritan, Corvallis, and chaplain to the diocesan School for Deacons. Contact her at deacon@goodsamchurch.com.